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Choosing your Wedding party members.

11 Oct

Choosing your wedding party members can often be a bit daunting  for some people and follow with a few a hard decisions on just “who” should be present alongside you on your big day. For some, it’s way too easy and they invite everyone they can think of!

Often Brides are quick to share their wonderful news and end up making quick decisions on their bridal party members way to early in the process and end up regretting it later or causing themselves unnecessary stress as the planning moves forward.

Here are some quick key points to remember when deciding your Wedding party members:

WAIT. There is nothing stating that you need to decide on everyone and everything  right away. It is usually best to wait until after you have set a date and booked your main ceremony ideals, once you have a rough idea on your guest count. Choose the people that are the closest to you and who you know are going to be happy to help you along the way when you need it.

It can also look a bit silly if you might plan to have a smaller wedding of only 50 people (for example) but then opt to have a Wedding party of 12+ members! I was once told by a wedding planner that one of the best ‘rules’ to follow regarding this is the wedding ‘pre-set’ rule; For every 50 guests, one Bridal party member. This keeps visual balance to the wedding, photos etc. but also helps minimize excessive or unnecessary costs/spending.

COSTS. There are main factors that need to be considered, cost is typically the first to come to mind. Being a Wedding party member is often a big responsibility, so consider the circumstances of those you ask to join you, be that both personal and also financial.

It can often be a $250-$500 commitment to be in a wedding party which the purchasing/rental of attire, Make-up/Hair services for the ladies, hosting bachelor/bachelorette parties and so on.

With this cost also comes YOUR Expectations of the members you choose. Make sure your party members are ALL aware of your expectations. In fairness to them, these things need to be decided on FIRST, By you, before they say yes to the offer…whether you expect them to buy their own clothing, give a speech,  throw you a party or help with other details of the wedding proceedings.

Remember, Although your wedding day is likely the most important thing happening in your life right now, it may not be the most important thing to them, or the most affordable, at the present time…be courteous of that and keep perspective. They may REALLY WANT To be a member in your party, but just may not be able to afford the means or have the time necessary for the responsibilities.

FAMILY MEMBERS. Often you will find invites can be given out to “select” family members. Be cautious with this area, especially if you are very close with them. As sometimes you may feel the need to include other family members that might not necessarily fit within your wedding plans, solely out of  ‘fairness’ to the others you’ve now invited, or in other cases you might end up causing strain in relationship if one is not included and they become jealous of  another persons inclusion over them. If you find yourself in this situation, It can sometimes be best to give them all ‘other’ responsibilities pertaining to the wedding and its arrangements that way everyone feels included, without any unnecessarily drama that can sometimes occur.

At the end of it all, Your wedding party is there with you on your day to offer support and love to you and your new partner. If you take your time in choosing the right members and communicate with them you are sure to create a stress free journey as you plan your wedding and head towards the big day. Good luck!

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