Are you the Bride that gets yourself FIRED?

Bridal season is in full swing and in the past few days I have had an overwhelming surge of last minute requests come through for services, some as close as 2 days before a wedding! This in turn has prompted some VERY interesting conversations with a number of brides left scrambling for vendor services mere days before their wedding.

So today I’d like to touch on a subject of “getting fired” by your vendors. Yes it does happen and more often than one might think….and I feel it be very important for brides to understand the working behind such a decision, as you very well might be heading in that direction and not even know it!

During a few recent conversations, I listened to a few brides stating their case of “what happened” and “why” they were without services, some photographers, some Hair and Make-up, some decorators and so on. Upon listening to many, it was evident that it wasn’t just simply a case of mishap or schedule changing, but full out FIRING of the bride-to-be due to her behavior towards their vendors in question…

Sadly, so many brides are now watching these reality programs on weddings, which do paint quite an un-realistic picture of both what actually happens behind the scenes, but worse yet implies that if you throw a large enough tantrum and go “bridezilla”, that vendors will bend over backwards for you…which unfortunately is completely opposite!  Bridezilla behavior will likely result in your vendors just walking away and FIRING YOU, leaving you scrambling.

Although it seems that the closer you get to your big day the more seems to happen, just know that in the end it will all be okay!! Every bride experiences stress, but how you handle it is key. Today I want to discuss what taking your stress out on those around you can lead to.

Although you may be having quite an ordeal with your wedding planning, keeping in mind that your vendors are likely dealing with that same ordeals with anywhere up to 100 or more other brides during bridal season.

So here are a few areas that I think should be addressed, education is the goal here so that you don’t find yourself in this situation.

#1 – Be fair to your vendors

Do unto your vendor as you want them to do at your wedding! These people are there to help make your day amazing and special. Running them through the ringer with constant last minute changes and indecisive behavior, may lead to them just walking away from it all… if you can’t get it together for them, why would they want to help?  Vendors can’t plan anything for you, if you yourself are in constant flux.

#2 – Communicate.

Your vendors do not read minds, I cannot stress that enough.  Lying to their face saying you “like” something, only to turn around a mere few days before a wedding asking for complete overhaul is very disrespectful of the work that professional vendors put into making your day perfect.   Last minute changes, never usually work out.  Emergencies do happen, so when things change let them know and allow them time to respond, especially over a weekend.  Weekends are the busiest time for wedding pros, as they are likely AT another wedding servicing other brides.  It is for this reason that responses to calls and emails are slower from Fridays through Sundays.

#3 – Be respectful

Yes things change, and your vendors understand this… but screaming, crying and throwing tantrums like a child gets you nowhere. Stepping out of line with childish name calling, demands, and hiding behind friends, family or your wedding planner will not give you the result you are looking for. Instead a vendor is to likely peg you as a drama queen and drop you completely rather than deal with your childish behavior.  Many vendors now have “abuse” clauses in their contract which allows them to terminate services and collect their full payments immediately if they feel threatened. Another thing we can thank TV For, as many vendors did not feel the need for such addition into their contracts, until many of these bridal shows came out!

#4 – Be clear and firm with your plans from the get-go

Booked your photographer for an entire day, only to email them 3 days before the wedding to tell them you only want them for 2 hours? Booked beauty services for 5 people only to now have “Bride only” for services? Not only are you now in breach of your contract, you have now likely cost them other business and clients they could have booked while holding and scheduling a full day for your services. This is often the biggest cause of Brides getting themselves fired and comes down to the age old saying; Don’t say one thing (and sign for it) only to turn around and do another… although vendors will try to accommodate the best they can, it may not always turn out as originally thought due to last minute and overhauled changes. Your day would now be on their time, not yours!

#5 – Know when to listen…and READ (emails, etc)

In most cases brides are planning for the first time. You may “think” you know how something might pan out under your own organization, but sadly 9 times out of 10 it’s a flop. Listen to your vendors’ suggestions, tips and advice given…this includes all emailed information and listings on their websites, as many vendors aim to educate you on ALL facts, BEFORE you even book! Turning around 1 week prior with an “I didn’t know” is inexcusable, especially in the cases of those who have had their contracts/paperwork for months prior that outline all such details in question, long before they even signed and booked services.

Take the time to READ IT all through. That includes pricing, policies/terms, start times, leave times, recommendations for planning and so on…If you have any questions about it, just ask them! Remember that in the end your vendors are there to ensure your day is flowing smoothly.  They know how best to make your day relaxed and fun. They do this for a living and see ALL angles, and can foresee things that more often than not a client hasn’t even thought of yet.

In the end, weddings are another part of life, and unforeseen changes can happen, but being respectful and handling situations in an adult manner will make things a lot easier and keep you from being ditched by those you aim to hire. No one likes conflict!  Think about the best way to deal with the situation, and then put yourself on the receiving end for a minute….how would you react watching yourself?   Your wedding is supposed to be one of the most beautiful days of your life, and we are always sorry to watch a beautiful bride ruin her own day!!!

Here’s wishing you a fantastic wedding and that your vendors brag about your courteous and easygoing nature to other vendors and clients for years to come!